Summer Movie Pre-Law Preview

Hey, summer is almost here! For those of you signed up for the June LSAT, you’re already painfully aware of this. The summer brings LSAT pains, but it also brings blockbusters. To make you feel less guilty about taking time out of your busy LSAT schedule to catch a movie or two (or seven), I’m going to tell you how seeing these movies will help prep you for law school and the LSAT.

Avengers: Age of Ultron
Hollywood, in its latest low-risk grab for your money gives us yet another comic book movie. Avengers: Age of Ultron will hit theaters May 1st. Two sequels are already planned. If you’re gonna throw your money at this tired movie genre, at least let it be a reminder that like Hollywood, LSAC is lazy. Look at the Logic Games section. There hasn’t been anything new for decades now. It’s all just ordering or grouping, or both. If you’ve seen one, you’ve seen ‘em all. Don’t you wish LSAC would come out with something a bit new? Maybe like this Singaporean grade school logic game. No you’re right, that would be terrifying. Maybe there’s something good and comforting about seeing the same old, same old.

Speaking of terror, Poltergeist comes out May 22nd. Yeah it’s another remake. But did you know that a New York court once ruled that a house was haunted? Well not quite. The NY court ruled that, as a matter of law, the defendants couldn’t deny that their house was haunted. That’s not nearly as fun. Anyway, these are the kind of fine-grained distinctions you’ll have to understand to do well on the LSAT (and at law school).

San Andreas
San Andreas is basically a retelling of Taken. Just replace Liam Neeson, with the Rock, and the Albanian mobsters with an earthquake. Following an earthquake, the Rock sets off for San Francisco to rescue his daughter from roving bands of hipsters and geriatric hippies looking for charging stations for their electric cars. The tagline for San Andreas is, “We always knew this day would come.” For those of you who don’t live in California, this is a reference to the dangers of living on the San Andreas Fault. Basically, the Fault is where two tectonic plates rub up against each other, making California a high-risk area for earthquakes. I have it on good authority (my own) that we’re in for a geology themed Reading Comprehension passage. What better way to familiarize yourself with the topic than to let the Rock be your guide?

Terminator: Genisys
Terminator and Terminator 2: Judgment Day were two of my favorite childhood movies. The rest of the series has been pretty disappointing. But I’ll give Genisys a chance. The Terminator series is based around an A.I. network known as Skynet that becomes self-aware, and, of course, decides to cut humans out of the picture. One of the neat things about Skynet is that after trying and failing to kill John Connor, the future leader of the human resistance, Skynet does something a little different: it adds a bit of diversity to its time-traveling robot assassin crew. Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines brought us a female killer robot, the T-X. Genisys will feature a Korean T-1000. This is a reminder for y’all to write your diversity statements. It doesn’t matter if you’re female, Korean, or an Austrian bodybuilder who once compared lifting weights to having orgasms. If you think you might be diverse, take a shot at a diversity statement. It’s just one double-spaced page, and if executed artfully, it can’t hurt.

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