Sometimes, after a long day at work, you just want to come home, turn on your favorite show, and wonder What Would They Score on the LSAT?
For this installment, let’s talk about It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, the beloved and depraved FX sitcom following a rag-tag group of ignorant, self-absorbed, morally bankrupt bar owners in the City of Brotherly Love. Over the course of 10 seasons, they’ve gone on some zany adventures, but what would happen if the gang took the LSAT? Here are my predictions:
Dennis Reynolds – Always Sunny LSAT Score: Disqualified
Dennis gets halfway through the first Logic Games sections before realizing that he’s in way over his head. Never one to admit defeat, he tries to seduce one of his test proctors, hoping to convince her to give him the answers. Of course, the proctor doesn’t have the answers, and doesn’t appreciate it when Dennis keeps trying to take his shirt off.
Mac – Always Sunny LSAT Score: 135
Mac is better known for his brawn than his brains, but he’s no dummy. Well… that’s unclear. He certainly doesn’t have the patience to sit for a 4.5 hour, six-section test of logic and critical thinking. He’s got things to do, people to see, and karate moves to perform against imaginary adversaries. He fills in Cs all the way down and spends the rest of the test wishing Chase Utley would return to the Phillies.
Charlie Day– Always Sunny LSAT Score: 123
Unlike the others, who are only taking the LSAT on a whim; Charlie really wants to be a lawyer. So he dedicates himself body and soul to preparing. He spends long nights reviewing legal terms and watching Law & Order reruns, and after completing the test, he walks out thinking he nailed it. But confidence alone is not enough. Charlie’s dream of practicing law just isn’t meant to be.
Dee Reynolds – Always Sunny LSAT Score: 166
Dee has a chip on her shoulder. No matter what she does, the gang never gives her any respect. So she seizes on the LSAT as an opportunity to quantitatively demonstrate her worth. She signs up for night classes, puts in long hours, and in the end, earns an impressive 166. When she strides triumphantly into the bar to brag about it, though, the gang will tell that they’ve moved on and don’t care anymore.