A. The dumpster fire that is the 2016 GOP presidential primary has officially become a 4 alarm dumpster inferno. Burn, baby, burn… dumpster inferno! Gawker
B. Miley Cyrus is joining The Voice. The world needed to know that there were women out there as insufferable as Adam Levine. E!
C. Tom Hiddleston is playing Hank Williams in a new biopic. We tolerated Daniel Day Lewis as Lincoln, but can we please get some Americans to play Americans? Get lost, Loki! The Los Angeles Times
D. According to the complaint in a lawsuit, Old Spice causes chemical burns and oozing sores. Now there’s another reason to switch to Axe besides the fact that it makes you all ROWR with the ladies. USA Today
E. Corinthian Colleges is ordered to pay former students tons of money for junk education. Daily Kos